Jason M. Jones

9. Dead Alive (1992; dir. Peter Jackson; original title: Braindead) – Part of the appeal of Zombie movies is often their ability to mix horror and humor, so that you’re both laughing and cringing simultaneously, though if you’re ever seen Peter Jackson’s Dead Alive, you’ll probably find that despite a number of laughs, you’re mostly cringing. The tagline on the cover that says “…The Goriest Fright Film of All Time,” is accurate. This is another that I first saw in High School, and at that time, the violence turned me off, but what I didn’t recognize then was how intentionally over the top Jackson designed this movie to be. I rented it again for a Halloween party in my early-20s, and viewing it with a large group of friends transformed the film from an unsettling walk through the carnage to a tongue-in-cheek, laugh out loud zombie masterpiece.

Now, given what I’ve stated above, I hope you understand two things:

1. This movie is best viewed with a larger group of people. I know I’m repeating myself here, but I just want to make sure I’m making myself heard. This is not really a sit down by yourself and enjoy the splatter-fest. Part of the fun of watching it in a group is that you’re all cringing and looking away together. When this is done right, you make eye-contact with a friend and laugh even harder.

2. Don’t say “Oh, Peter Jackson, I loved the Lord of the Rings trilogy!” and add this to your Netflix queue based on how much you enjoyed those furry little midgets running through the Shire. This is not that type of movie. In fact, this movie was preceded by a film called Bad Taste. Got that? Bad Taste!
With a raunchy puppet movie/Muppet parody in between called Meet the Feebles. At this point, we’re a long way from The Lovely Bones indeed.

So with that out of the way, what are you in store for? On its surface, Dead Alive is the story of a timid young mama’s boy, who falls in love with a local shop girl and develops a big brass pair of testes by battling zombies when his mother gets bitten by a Sumatran Rat Monkey. But the plot is really an excuse to throw copious amounts of bodily fluids at the screen. We get to see his mother’s transformation as pieces of her face come off and get superglued back on, as she drips puss from her bite into her guest’s pudding and allows them to continue eating; we get to see a priest kick ass like Bruce Lee (as in the clip below) before he turns into a zombie and has sex with a zombie nurse, producing zombie offspring; we get to see the timid mama’s boy take that zombie baby to the park in a barbed wire stroller only to battle it and knock its head against a swing set to subdue it after it escapes the stroller; and best of all, we get to see the timid mama’s boy get Medieval on these zombies with a lawnmower he straps to his chest after they set upon the partygoers that his sleazy opportunistic uncle invites to the house for an impromptu shindig.

I know, I know…to a lot of people this doesn’t sound appealing. To fans of the zombie genre, it is fucking sweeeeeet. This and Cemetery Man are really interchangeable on the later half of this list, as I like them both a great deal. It really depends on your mood. Cemetery Man is about atmosphere and does its best to create a strange dark world. Dead Alive is about absurdity and outrageous amounts of disgusting putrid rotting flesh. In fact, I’d go so far as to say, Peter Jackson might have been trying to offend those with more delicate sensibilities.  Remember: HE MADE BAD TASTE!!! Given that, it’s really up to you what you’d prefer to watch. But I’m recommending them both. Sit back, invite a few peeps over to your crib (did I pull that sentence off?), and view them back to back. As long as you’re not trying to eat while you watch, it’ll be a good time. I promise.